Shame

People who feel shame often feel guilty, but shame is distinct from guilt. Whereas guilt is the feeling of having done a bad thing, shame is the emotion of being bad, as a characteristic of one’s fundamental identity.

Guilt can be atoned for, with a restorative action compensating for a previous wrong. A feeling of shame, however, cannot be dislodged so easily, because no amount of worthwhile actions can change a person’s feeling of being inherently flawed.

Social groups often attempt to shame people who don’t follow normative rules of behavior. However, the emotion of shame only takes place when a person in some sense agrees with the social judgment that has been cast against them, accepting the accusation that who they are is something to be ashamed of. People can refuse to be ashamed, despite the attempts of others to shame them.