Miriam-Rose Ungunmerr, a member of the Ngangikurungkurr people of the Daly River region of northern Australia, describes the frame of mind called dadirri. “When I experience dadirri,” she says, “I am made whole again. I can sit on the riverbank or walk through the trees; even if someone close to me has passed away, I can find my peace in this silent awareness. There is no need of words. A big part of dadirri is listening.”
Dadirri, as she describes it, is a contemplative condition in which a person is content to be without words of their own, without hurrying, to listen attentively. It’s an open, accepting emotion, ready to hear not only what other people have to say, but what the world itself seems to say.
Dadirri is the foundation of the pursuit of emotional granularity. Instead of accepting a split-second first impression, a person experiencing dadirri is willing to slow down and pay attention to the subtext of a moment, to try to hear what is really being said, to see what is truly being felt in the moment.
The experience of dadirri requires us to let go of our immediate, easy interpretations of a situation. It calls upon us to sit and listen not only to the opening words of what is being said, but also to the turning of communication into unexpected directions. It invites us to accept that there is more that is worthy of our understanding than the ideas that we bring to a conversation.
Dadirri is what happens to us when we take the time to notice that there is more to the world than what we have known.
